San Francisco, CA — In a bold move that’s raising eyebrows across the tech industry, social media upstart Bluesky has announced plans to formally introduce harassment as a key feature on their platform. The decision comes as part of their “user engagement optimization” initiative, which aims to mimic the chaotic charm of more established platforms like X, The Everything App.

“Any great platform has at least some harassment to spice things up,” said Bluesky’s Head of Security, visibly unphased by the collective gasp of reporters. “We’re leaning into what makes online communities thrive: a little chaos, a sprinkle of drama, and the occasional unhinged rant.”

Unlike the “free-for-all” harassment seen on other platforms, Bluesky claims theirs will be “curated and algorithmically enhanced” for maximum engagement. According to insiders, users can expect features like “Personalized Trolling” and “Daily Slurs.”

“It’s not just harassment; it’s premium harassment,” explained the company’s Head of Product. “We’re using cutting-edge AI to ensure every user feels personally attacked in a way that’s relevant to their interests and insecurities. It’s harassment, but with heart.”

The announcement has sparked a firestorm of debate online. Some users are intrigued by the platform’s transparency. “At least they’re honest about it,” said one early adopter. “Other platforms pretend to care about moderation, but Bluesky’s just like, ‘Yeah, you’re gonna get roasted. Deal with it.’”

Others, however, are less impressed. “Harassment isn’t a feature,” said one user, who has already deactivated their account. “This is just an excuse to let trolls run wild.”

Meanwhile, Elon Musk, owner of X, The Everything App, responded to the news with a post reading, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,” followed by 3 fire emojis.

Despite the backlash, BlueSky’s leadership remains steadfast. “We’re here to disrupt the social media landscape,” said the company’s CEO. “And if that means fostering a bit of toxicity, so be it. We’re building a platform for the people—the angry, sarcastic, petty people.”

As part of their rollout, BlueSky is reportedly planning a “Harassment Beta Test” where users can opt-in to experience the new feature.